Comfort vs Competency

On my go-to TV shows for different feelings.

Somehow, some way, it is the end of May, and I have been plugging away on my Mid-Year Media Mayhem project, which kicks off NEXT WEEK. And so I’ve been thinking a lot about what types of TV shows I tend to enjoy more than others, and what I mean when I say I have a “comfort show” that might be different than how other people mean it.

I listen to Amy Poehler’s podcast Good Hang, and she talks a lot about comfort shows and how her show Parks & Rec is that for a lot of people. But she also sometimes interviews guests who find it surprising that their much more stressful shows are comfort shows to some people. Which I can relate to, since I’ve been told it’s borderline diabolical that one of my comfort shows—and, in fact, one of the handful of shows in my life that I’ve rewatched top to bottom more than once—is Criminal Minds. When asked about this, and just the fact that despite being someone who loves all types of shows (especially gay ones) that I do watch so many procedurals aimed at boomer dads, I sometimes say it’s because it’s a comforting formula. Bad guy does bad thing, good guy hunts bad guy, good triumphs over evil, rinse and repeat. And while that is a comforting formula, I often wondered why this pattern would soothe me when, in general, because of my particular flavor of ADHD, I tend to not like when things get too patterned or obvious. It’s why I don’t often re-watch or re-read things; if I know too much about what’s going to happen, it can sometimes take the fun out of it for me. It’s also one of the reasons why I don’t tend to like romcom books or movies; where’s the fun of it if you know the happily ever after is guaranteed? So I wondered what it was about these procedurals I’m drawn to, like Criminal Minds or, more recently, the entire NCIS franchise, if not the comforting pattern.

One reason is definitely the found family of it all. But I like that in any genre, so it’s not just that. Then I heard someone describe The Pitt as “competency porn” and it hit me. I really like watching people be good at their jobs. It’s why a show like Parks & Recs isn’t a comfort watch for me. It’s something I would go to for giggles, for sure. It’s a cheer-up show, a go-to if I need a pick-me-up. But not a comfort watch. Because bless their hearts but that entire office shares about five brain cells between them, and Leslie Knope usually has four of them. So while it’s funny and fun and great, it’s not something I would consider comforting. And on the other end of the spectrum, it’s why I DON’T like shows like The Office. Michael Scott is a nightmare character to me. Why is a bumbling idiot in charge? I know there are companies like that in real life, but good LORD is it frustrating and I don’t like watching it. Same with shows like Emily in Paris. That girl fails up the entire show! It’s infuriating.

Of course, I don’t need people to be good at their jobs to like a show. That would be a boring life to lead. In general I prefer a mess of a main character, stumbling through life with a sense of humor and a good heart. Or a badass who needs to learn how to let people in. Someone lost who needs to find their way. The messier the better. But those are the shows I love and talk about and write about and think about. They’re not what I would consider “comfort” shows. Like, when I rewatch Hill House and Bly Manor, it’s not for comfort. I rewatch those to watch devastatingly beautiful stories unfold. I watch those to connect to the characters and root for them and have my heart break for them. I watch those to feel something. (And for the ghosts.)

I wouldn’t even call something like The Pitt a comfort show for me even though it is, in fact, competency porn. Because so much can still go so wrong. That said, of course it’s a brilliant show and I love watching it. It’s “appointment TV” for me. And I’ll probably rewatch the first two seasons before the third comes out. But not for comfort.

I think Buffy the Vampire Slayer probably falls somewhere unique in this spectrum. Because when I rewatch Buffy it does have an element of comfort to it, but not because I know what’s going to happen, or even necessarily because of the format or plot. It’s because the characters are familiar, they’re people I have “known” since I was nine years old, they’re lines and jokes and relationships I’ve been seeing for practically my whole life. There’s a nostalgia factor to it, on top of just generally loving the story and the characters. For me that show is something like comfort, but not in the same brainless way a procedural feels comfortable to watch. The feeling is more akin that meme, “Not my home, but I know my way around.”

Anyway, I know I’m overthinking and overanalyzing phrases that probably mean something different to everyone, but that’s where I’m currently at with the term “comfort watch” and its definition. And I reserve my right to change my mind about that in the future.

And you’re about to learn a whole lot about what kind of media I consume, because next week starts Mid-Year Media Mayhem, which means for the entire month of June, my newsletter will be all media all the time. First up is video games! See ya there!

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